A few weeks back, Tali and I took a vacation to Costa Rica. It was a bit of a cleansing ritual for us. New city for her, new house same city for me. I felt we could use a transition respite to give us some perspective on life. I sat on on this post for over a week, to let things sort themselves out in my head. I started this post 4 days ago, and its been sitting open on the same tab in my browser, carefully avoided, computing around it. So Here I am back, again, another attempt at consolidation,
distillation, digestion.
I don't really know how to describe this journey to people. The
physical Beauty of Costa Rica is indescribable. Very soon after the airport, the mind begins to shut down, unable to process all of the new information. Tali and I stayed at a place called
Eco Era, definitely not a resort, though completely comfortable, safe. During past stays in Costa Rica I've lived much more rustically for sure. I know this may seem trivial to people who live in tropical, or more wild climates, but for a couple of city kids the experience is jarring. But now onto the truth that I've put it off long enough. Don't expect anything shockingly interesting, or wild tales of memories consolidated into stories. This experience is something I refuse to compromise on.
There are moments in our lives where we are blessed with visions so encompassing; so outside of current convention, we are compelled to leave behind our heretofore, beautiful but now limited version of life. At one time that version delivered to our mind the what we believed we expected of life. The new vision comes as a fire storm, or a walk into an unknown land. What we bring back from the walk is the same we always intuited, but with truth previously unknown to our minds. After the fire, we are left with the sooty jewels and are left to seperate the illusion and wonder, finally left with the recognition that our mind is still an imperfect tool.
Through that fire, we are released from the bondage of our attachments.
Anymore, I feel as though I am compelled to speak in code when I am asked to address life. In public life, beyond our own consciousness being true to ourselves is an art. Something I did not grasp as deeply as I do now. I have endeavored on the path of discovering art, this is what I have discovered. Sometimes the photograph (code) surprises even the photographer. I see now how the meals we eat along the path require each of us to digest differently. How the fruit we find is unique to where our eyes land within the tree. The paradox remains for those that think luck is a coincidence, that their apparent separateness is the ultimate reality.
If that's not a load of crap I don't know what is. I guess all I'm trying to say is, I Don't Know Anymore. Or put another way, I used to think I was wise. Now I am not sure what wisdom truly is, I only know that I am connected to wisdom. I think that may be enough to pinpoint me on the map, If you were wondering where I'm at. I feel a posting forming about what it means to translate this to artistic expression.
